Jacking off before bed

Just bending over to put on your socks

and grubbing people every day.

Well, not anymore.

Introducing Socks Lighters.

The pain-free, no bend-over way to grub

everybody put on their socks every day.

Introducing Easy Makeup Glasses.

The clever single lens eyeglasses

that magnify each eye to apply.

It swings out of the way so you can have flawless makeup

every day.

Hush Me, this personal acoustic device

that protects human privacy in dark space environments.

By using explosive passive voice suppression

and active voice masking technology.

Introducing Wonder Bibles.

The incredible Bible that speaks.

The Lord is my shepherd.

I lack nothing.

**** will love Wonder Bible.

In the beginning, God created.

The arrows held the earth.

Diamonds are one of the hardest surfaces on earth.

This one is worth $25,000.

But it's worthless if you're trying to cut it to make home.

That's why we created Yuppie Pro Diamond Edition knives.

Make salt in the Smart Salt Sensor.

Shake, pinch, or pour all using your smart phone.

Worst equals are high performance people.

Integrate glass, cavity removal, each product

has a wealthy outlet.

...